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Monday, October 29, 2007

Barangay Election

It's Barangay Election again.
As usual, people are holding hands, praying for their candidate to win.
One person was mugged by the other party's watcher claiming he is a flying voter.
There is a shortage of tally sheets, and so, teachers improvised -- manila paper creatively designed to look like tally sheets.
Dead people voting.
One man resisting the ink to be put on his forefinger claiming he never had those blue tints on his finger before.
Teachers in one province are scared for their lives.
Children giving sample ballots...
One candidate got nabbed at a shabu-session, sniffing HER brains out.

Oh, and my father-in-law ran...(crossing my finger)

and thus, report on Barangay Election 2007 concluded three pm this afternoon with my mom voting at the last minute...go pinoy.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

twisted relationships

I'm your typical girl.
I am brown-skinned, I have a long black mane.
I wear casual clothes - usually a V-necked top that extends around 5 inches below my knee, jeans, flip flops or sandals...usually these days, I wear my havas coz they are comfortable.
I have my big purse, the kind that looks as if I'm stowing away from home and my mobile phone on right hand.

In some days, I look tousled -- as if I just got lucky last night -- where I have that sultry look where a secret grin is almost concealed...a grin most likely because I'm sharing a private joke with this gorgeous man beside me.

And the moments we've shared are all worth its weight in gold.
Not only does he make me laugh, he brings me food when I'm in the mood to eat pizza and nothing else, or he would spoil me with ice cream if he thinks the time is right. He cleans my place if it's too messy...He brings me the latest lip gloss that will soon eventually become my favorite until he brings me another one.
We stare at each other's eyes and faces while we stifle our giggles.
we do little hand signals that drives us to blush.
He touches my face, he whispers funny little nothings.
We banter.
we tease.
we flirt...

just about anything a great relationship can give you.

He is the perfect man -- for that next hottie to pass by. You see, he is my gay bestfriend. And no matter how good looking he may look- fact remains that we both prefer the same sex. Relationship with a gay friend, especially with a good looking one is the ultimate friendship with the opposite sex.It is a friendship where boundaries need not to be vague as there is no line to cross in the first place...or so we thought.

I have no problem with our friendship but some women get the illusion of being in love with their gay friends. A scenario that will always result to disillusionment. You see, when you are friends with someone gay and you are a woman, the relationship is just so great. Both of you just can't have enough of each other. I, for one thing, just can't get enough of him. Whatever might happen to me, be it good or bad, I have to tell him. His number is the most dialled and texted number in my phone. I see something good, I have to tell him. I lost my purse, my phone, my heel broke, I'm stranded, I have no money, I found a lottery ticket, i forgot something, my ear hurts, I have a bad hair day ....eveyrthing -- he must know...
I go to his place often or he stays and sleeps with me...and sleeps with me on the same bed.
We have a favorite restaurant.
We ogle at the bodies of men in the gym.
We exchange intimacies -- in and out of bed -- except that we don't have sex.
We share a relationship where we share everything except for our men.

And some women gets overwhelmed with that kind of relationship that they find themselves thinking of building a relationship with their gay bestfriend, making their efforts to date other men unsuccesful.

The often fatal mistake they do is that they start to compare the men they meet to the fag they so love. And most often than not, the men end up short. Heck, all men will end up short - they are clumsy, they are insensitive, and they hate shopping. Most often than not, the emotional support you get from them is a grunt and his span of attention is as long as that advertisement running on tv. Most of us straight women who has a gay bestfriend wishes to have a relationship with men that reflects the one that we have with our fab fag. Someone who can understand us when we rant about how the weather makes our hair dry, or how our officemate is trying to ruin our work, or how we find the shoes of Carrie in Sex and the city just irresistible. Someone who knows the value of a sale. Someone who would go crazy over the next johnny depp film. Who stops to watch baseball to accompany us to the theater...

but that is a tall order...and something that we might not want if served in a silver platter....and besides...our gay bestfriends would trade the giggles he's having with us for a great night with another gay lover...
at least, with our men, when he says, he's with his buddies, drinking or playing poker...they are really drinking or playing poker or something...just imagine how devasting it would be if we find out they're engaged in eachother's arms -- locked in french kiss....eowww.

Friday, October 12, 2007

i'm still sick


it's been how many days now since i'm having trouble breathing normally. almost all of the time, i breathe through my mouth. yuck! waaah! and i can't taste anything, because the tongue for it to work at its best, you must be able to smell too...and i can't smell anything, even the most foul of foul or the most sour of sour. hahay

i blame my mom for this.

do you know that shot that you're supposed to take to boost your immune system? what do you call that? yes that...well, my mom, decided that i can skip that shot and the shots to follow...the only shot i got was a tetanus shot. I got it when i had a pedicure and my big toe was swelling like a tomato...oh *shudder...i still remember, i was recommended to another pedia by my pedia's secretary coz he is not around. I'm terrified of needles and have to have three male nurses chase me to have that injection -- oh by the way, i was already 21 then...hehehe!

fear of needles is something i got from my mom. In her fear of needles, she decided to not get me my shots. Come to think of it, when i had my four molars taken out...she left me at the dentist with our neighbor looking after me, while she is outside the building...doing...i don't know...pacing i guess...

so here i am, one cough from someone passing by, and i get sick.
a little drizzle and i get wet, i get sick.
someone sniffing, gets me sneezing in no time.

maaaannnnn....it's so annoying, especially when you can't breathe and you have a gallon of ice cream in the fridge. waaaaaahhhhh!!!!!

why, oh, why does it have to be meeeee?!!!!

Thursday, October 11, 2007

i'm sick

i'm so sick.

my head is pounding.
my lower back is hurting.
i can't breathe as my nose is stuffed with "god knows what" snots.
i have a cough.
i look like a hag.
my shoulders are very heavy,
my legs are tired for no apparent reason.
i always sneeze.
and half the time, i feel like i want to be dead...or not.

help.help.help.
*sniff

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

soo bored.

My nanny decided to change curtains. And suddenly it's so bright now. Everybody is busy doing things they think they should be doing. One is cleaning the windows, one washing the dishes, and God know what my little tyke is doing...trying to make the flowers grow by urinating on them, I guess.

Ask me what I'm doing. Nothing. Staring at my screen thinking of ways to keep myself busy even if I really am not. Haayy...I'm at this point of my life where I am bored. I've been bored for quite sometime now. It seems as if, everybody always has something more important to do. They are always busy, busy, busy.

Hmmm...what should I do? what should I do?

go to a bar tonight. nah...I don't really like to meet new people.
go to the mall...and do what? shopping? nah...there is really nothing to buy. I'm not that fond of clothes and stuff. and besides, I don't feel like dressing up and stuff today. I could always go in my pajamas...but I don't want to see the world or my friends, for that matter...they'll only nag that I change.
read a book. the book i want to read is not yet available.
stare at the walls? been there, done that. It didn't work.
watch tv. again?! haaay
cook. bad idea...the last attempt was a disaster.
clean the house. they are already doing it.

waaaahhhh.....

do a blog? purrrfect....

Monday, October 08, 2007

coffee


i love coffee...something i share with the rest of the world i guess...or 3/4 of its population.

I usually get my first sip early in the morning, before breakfast. It perks me up and lifts my mood. It's really a big help in making me less grumpy. Although I have no problem with me being grump, everybody else has...so they make sure i get my dose of caffeine before anything else...I think they exaggerate sometimes...but hey, who's complaining... ^.^


do you know me?

Every time we talk about something, we tend to talk as if we always know what we are talking about.

For example, when we talk of someone.

She is such a bitch.
She talks like as if she never entered an educational system.
She is this.
She is that.
oh, my god! and look at her chew at that gum!
Did you hear about her new boyfriend?
Why'dya think he picked her?!
It must be the money, the sex, and for whatever it's worth, I won't be like her!
It all boils down to one cliche..."it takes one to know one".

how can you say if the fruit is an apple? It's because you have a notion of what an apple is like. And so no matter how your friend insist on calling the orange apple, she just managed to change the name, but not the orange itself. Calling one something does not automatically makes that something into what you called it. Before I get carried away with the apples and the oranges, let me say my point...we can only label and say things that we have known. In the case of judging people, we cannot really know for sure. Human beings are unpredictable and unlike the mentioned fruits, there is no significant category for each and human being. Blame it on our awareness of ourselves. We are aware of who we are and thus, we gained the opportunity to change or enhance that part of ourselves that we think needs it. However, we may have awareness of other things and people, our perspective of our reality is not what they really are -- but we see them as we are.

Let me expound on that.

We all have backgrounds and we all have our own unique molds. We share the same world and may meet the same people...but we look at them individually. There may be collective agreement on certain things like, the square has four sides and the world is round, however, in closely looking at reality, we all have a myriad of frame and individual understanding making the details of our present, past, and future an individualized reality that each of us can only own.

Let's say marriage.
Some people hate it.Others are happy with it. Some people, after a failed marriage are willing to try it again, some people would rather be dead than say the words "I do". Other people do so for money, others - because of obligation. Others do it as an escape from their current situation, other do it to save someone else's life. Some people marry out of need, others out of greed. Others do so, just because, few do so, for a very important reason. A marriage may take place with or without love, with or without needs, with or without consent...
and I haven't gotten into the details yet.

and so when we try to judge a person, we really judge ourselves. We get the illusion of knowing who she is when we unknowingly compare ourselves to that other person. The benchmark always, when we look at other people and things, is ourselves. The jewelry is nice. The picture is significant. The man is good-looking.

so let me then be clear -- looking at other people and the world in general is really looking into a mirror...they just reflect a different face.

hateful people hate themselves.
unhappy people are people who are not contented with themselves.
greedy people want everything for themselves.
people who looks at the world with pain are people who burdens himself/herself with unnecessary guilt.

Ever notice something with people who are happy with who they are and what they have? They seldom complain of other people and of little things...it's because, they have nothing to complain about themselves ...

i bid you a happy self-hunting. May you like what you find.

just perfect...


When I was a little girl, I imagined myself to be the perfect housewife. The woman who has the perfect hair, smile, and manners. Who gives out the perfect posture and reaction to any event. The one that opens her mouth in an O, with her perfect delicate left hand covering her lips while striking that perfect pose, every time she is surprised. A champ in the kitchen, the best in keeping the house clean, who knows every question her husband asks, and never ever gets angry in public.

Guess what i've become? the perfect opposite.

I have yet to cultivate the virtue of combing. When it's hot, I coil my hair with a pen. My favorite shirt is close to becoming a rag. I have a bad habit of chewing my nails. I pout and my eyes get to open up in a big O --> O.0 , making me look like a scared monkey, when I'm surprised. I've managed to put my mother's kitchen on fire (as for my kitchen, I am cautious, I have a cook -- *evil laugh - mwahahahah!), my room is almost always a mess of books, papers, and lots and lots of scattered pillows. And although I don't put out my tantrums for other people to get a show, i pout, and pout, and pout. So far, I can answer almost all of my boyfriend's questions -- but I get to be called a smartass in the end.

I wonder what went wrong when I had it all figured out perfectly. bleah!

Sunday, October 07, 2007

Luis Royo

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. Albert Einstein 1879-1955.
the first time i heard of him, i was fascinated with what i heard. the first time i saw his art...i was speechless.

i love it...so much that i've been scouring for his art works all over the globe.unfortunately for me, they are all so expensive. huhuhu! sigh...

for those who doesn't know him, click (to see his artworks - unfortunately texts are in Spanish - lucky those who understand it.)


source: wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Luis Royo (born in 1954 in Olalla, Spain) is a Spanish artist, known for his darkly sensual paintings of women and mechanical life forms. He has also recently started doing sculptures of some of his earlier art.

He was born in Olalla, a small town near Teruel, Spain. He has produced many paintings for his own books/exhibitions, and has also produced art for various other media: videogames, CD album covers, comic book covers, and Tarot cards.

He is most famous for his work doing illustrations of Julie Strain for the animated movie Heavy Metal.

Friday, October 05, 2007

empty me


bubbles.
soap suds.
hot chocolate.
dead television.
scattered slippers.
busted mobile phone
empty cups.
half-eaten cake.
torn pages.
somehow, in the process of running from my fears, i've lost myself.
nothing is left to be said but...save me.